When I posted on Monday, I thought that letting everyone know what had happened was simply the right thing to do. Looking in on someone's life through a blog or other media or trying to share your life with another this way can be hard. I have loved sharing what the Lord has done in our lives and love being able to encourage another.
It wasn't an easy thing to post Monday, and while I don't share every little detail of life here, I have always tried to share both the joys and trials....the good and the not so good. And so I share what has been the hardest trial yet.
I thought that after I shared, I would close this chapter of life via the blog. I would privatize the blog so I could someday print it up as a journal of our time here in Mexico, but didn't see the need to write further.
We have been so blessed by the outpouring of love, care, and prayer for our family. To truly experience God's grace in such a real way has touched our hearts in the midst of our pain and given us such hope.
The first few days after everything happened, I was in such a dark cloud. I remember standing in the kitchen, sobbing, and saying, "Lord, I don't know how to do this. I don't know what to think, what to do, what to feel, how we will make it. I just don't know how." I hadn't read a book on this. Nor would I have ever wanted to. I'd heard about this happening before, but I'd hear someone confessed, had to leave, and that was the end. I don't know what happens next.
Confession, repentance, brokenness, forgiveness, love, grace, growth....ashes to beauty. That is what I believe our Lord can do! I don't want Monday to be the end of our story. Yes, this chapter has come to a bleak end, but another chapter is about to be written.
Will you walk with us? I think the Lord may want me to share this journey. I don't know how often or how much. But while I don't know the way, don't know what lies ahead, and my heart is sometimes overwhelmed with so much, I know the ONE who is not only walking with me but is leading the way. I trust Him. I love Him. And I know He is here.
So many praying for us. Tear flow unceasingly as we hear from those who care.
Psalms 143. That is the Psalm the Lord gave me in my darkest night. I will share that with you soon.