Welcome! Nuestra Casa Es Su Casa ...Our house is your house

A glimpse into the life of Daniel and Jaynee Lockwood and their 12 precious blessings. Thank you for visiting; we pray that what we share here may always bring glory to our wonderful God and Saviour. May you praise the Lord with us for the great things He has done and continues to do as we serve Him sharing the gospel here in the little town of Cuidad Insurgentes, BCS Mexico. He alone is good and faithful!

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

The Lord patiently taught me

“I agree with you on a lot of it. But when I read the part about 'so many little ones to train, teach, etc'--my thoughts were that you chose not to use birth control and abuse your body that way--live with it! I am sorry! I do not believe you can be effective for the Lord if you are run down, nursing and pregnant every year. Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. “

This is a comment I received after writing this post. This isn’t the first comment I have received along these same lines and while most of the comments left are encouraging and kind, a few are not.
Normally, I just chose to not publish them; but tonight I wanted to take a few minutes to comment on this one.
We have always wanted this blog to bring glory to the Lord Jesus Christ. I write this today not to defend myself nor to cause any argument or discussion here. In fact, if you do make it to the end of this probably long post :) , I ask you only to comment if you would like to encourage others as well. I also ask that you do not comment negatively to the anonymous commenter either. The The person who left this comment I believe (by the way they write) is the same person who has left similar comments before. I have no way of knowing for sure as they are always left anonymously. Maybe what I post tonight the Lord can use to help that individual see differently. The Lord has been so patient with me! But that is not my purpose in writing.
I write this because I wonder if there are other families who read here and may have heard things like this said to them. Or maybe they have wondered it themselves. When Daniel and I were pregnant with our 6th, I remember that we really began to seek the Lord in the matter of having children. We had always “said” we would have as many as He gave us, but we never actually thought about them coming every year. And so we really began to talk, pray, and study God’s Word. I still remember the day that the Lord gave me complete and wonderful peace…an assurance and joy about having children and giving Him full control. It took us about 3 years from the time we first really began to ask and seek the Lord in this area to when He confirmed the answer in our hearts.
During that time of seeking, questions and comments like these would really sadden me and cause me all sorts of doubts. And I thought if maybe I share what the Lord has done in our lives in this area, it may be an encouragement to another.
I understand that many may not believe as we do about having children/use of birth control. And many are still not sure. We have many dear friends on all sides of the issue. We just encourage each couple to pray and see what God’s Word says.
Do I get tired…very tired sometimes…with all the responsibilities of caring for my family? Yes! There are evenings when I can’t wait to get to bed only to be awoken several times with a little one. But this happened also when I had 3 children.
Is there a lot to be done every day? Yes! Hard work abounds…but I’ve truly never been happier…especially working with my family.
If I could go back in time and change anything…anything at all…spacing of my children, amount, coming to the mission field ect… would I? NO! I wouldn’t change a thing because the Lord led us here and gave us each one of our little ones in His timing.
When Daniel and I married, we both wanted many children and we both gave that area to the Lord the night of our honeymoon as we knelt together asking the Lord’s blessing on our marriage. After 6 months, we found out we were pregnant with Timothy. Most ladies told me that nursing would keep me from getting pregnant for several months. My siblings and I are all 2 years apart and I just assumed that’s how it worked.
The following year, Elijah was born. Timothy I had nursed strictly on a schedule, so with Elijah I was much more “on demand” thinking that maybe that would possibly slow things down a bit :). Thirteen months later, our first sweet daughter Rebekah was born.
I held and fed her non-stop; she was just so sweet with a head full of dark hair. And then 13 months later, bald little Benjamin joined his siblings. Another precious daughter, Abigail came right after Ben’s first birthday. That was the year I began home schooling Timothy and the year we found out sweet little Isaiah was on the way.
I was busy, often tired, seemed to never have “time for myself”, and was just always home taking care of babies. It was at that time I began to wonder if we should “do something” to space the children a little more.
Like I said, Daniel and I talked about it, prayed, and we just didn’t know…but within short order (from God :) ), our Josiah was on the way. At this time, we were on deputation sharing with churches our burden to share the gospel in Mexico and how much fun we had traveling and serving together as a family. Everyone loved the children (and the children loved meeting everybody), and the following year our first little “Mexican” boy, Noah, was born. And how many open doors we had in this new country simply because of our children!
So now I was living in a 3rd world country without the modern conveniences of America with 8 children 7 and under. I had some very difficult days to say the least :) And here we were missionaries now. And while Daniel always encouraged me that my job was to be his wife and mommy to our children and care for our home, and I knew that was right, I still had so many thoughts/doubts. I would think, “But if I didn’t have so many to care for, I would be able to do so much more to help Daniel in the ministry and help the people here.” I would see other missionary ladies (oh how the devil wants us to do the compare game getting our eyes off Jesus and on to others) and see all the “ministries” and “opportunities” they had….classes they taught, activities they did, all the out reaches…and here I was struggling to just find the time to learn the language. It was a very serious time of struggle in my heart.
I also want to add here that during our time here on the field, the Lord has brought us through MANY trials unlike we’d ever gone through before. And with each one, He drew me nearer and nearer to Himself. Though small, my faith was growing so much and I loved the Lord like I never had before. My heart was changing.
I soon became pregnant with our little Susannah and as I got the baby girl clothes all unpacked, washed and hung in the closet, I could not imagine “choosing” myself to just pack them up for good. I cried even thinking about it. The day after my due date, I woke up bleeding and due to placenta abruptio and the hospital not diagnosing it correctly, I lost a lot of blood and had to have an emergency c-section.
The Lord had/has always given me peace about my pregnancies/deliveries no matter how “high risk” they are. But when Daniel thought how he almost lost his wife, he really began to pray and seek the Lord about if we should do something so space the children out a bit. It was then the Lord truly changed our hearts and gave us such peace and joy.
For one, I truly saw what I was doing in our home, whether giggling with a baby while I changed his diaper, or washing lettuce with a little one, or hanging clothes with the girls, or listening to Timothy recite his memory verses, as exactly what the Lord wanted me to do. I saw it as important as teaching 10 Bible studies. I had so many little lives to teach of the Savior!
I began to see so many opportunities to reach out to others right from our home…baking bread and walking over with the children to take it to a neighbor to spend some time visiting with them, writing letters to those back at home who are so faithful to pray for us and support us here, sharing Bible stories with the children who come over to play with us in our back yard ect… And even when I am morning sick and just do my best to keep the home clean, meals cooked, clothes washed, and teach the children from my bed, I know that the Lord sees and is honored as I do just what he has called me to do…be a keeper at home!
Someday my children will go places that I have never gone; I pray that they will reach many more for the Savior than we ever do; they will be bringing up children of their own in the way of the Lord. And I want to have their hearts and continually point them to the Savior as we walk together each day in His grace.
When Daniel walks in from another hot, humid day walking the dusty streets teaching and preaching, I want him to rest assured that his children have been cared for, taught, and the home is in order. I want him to come home each day to a place where he can relax, hug on our babies, have a warm (or cool :) ) supper together as a family, and always be there to listen to him, pray for him, and love him.
I want to be an example of Titus 2:3-5 to the ladies here in our town. I want them to see another side that is completely opposite to what they are being taught by the government. I want them to know that children are a joy and blessing, that they don’t have to just go to work to make more money, leave their children to the schools and streets, and most of all to know the one who changes hearts and lives…Jesus Christ!
I also saw “time for myself” as I was viewing it as something so fleeting and unfulfilling. My time alone is spent early each morning (hopefully) before the little ones awake at the feet of the Savior giving him my every burden, praising and thanking Him for all He is and does, and listening to Him as I read His Word. He is where all my strength comes!
And I find so much joy, fun, and fulfillment in the little, wonderful things that the Lord has given me each day…having Noah pull up a chair and help me peel potatoes while we see who can get the “big strips”; holding Eliseo up in the air with my arms while I rest my tummy in bed and watching him giggle out loud…it’s just soooo cute; turning on our Scripture memory songs while we dance around with brooms and mops cleaning the floor together singing all the while; watching Nehemiah put band-aids on his stuffed frog’s owies as he kisses them and rubs froggy’s back.
I don’t have to be at home all the time caring for children; I get to be at home with my children every day! How wonderfully blessed I am!
Do we choose not to use birth control? We choose to love each other, thank the Lord for each and every child He chooses to give us, and know that His grace and strength will enable us to do all He calls us to do! And I can honestly say that each time we see the 2 lines on that test, that we have nothing but thankfulness, excitement, and joy!
Is it abusing (mistreating or misusing) my body to not use birth control? From what I have studied, there seems to be far more health problems and often emotional hurts too from those who have chosen to use birth control (especially certain types). God made a woman’s body to have babies. No where in Scripture do I find where it is wrong to have children…I always see the opposite. I have even read about the times called for abstinence and none of those times are during a time a woman can conceive. Why I’m not like many who have a bit more spacing due to nursing, I do not know. But I know God made me just how I am and why should the clay say to the Potter why have you made me this way?
People will put their bodies at risk all the time…some for the good of others and others for selfish reasons. A police man, a soldier, even missionaries in many countries put their lives at risk every day. Why? To protect, for the benefit and salvation of another. This last week during our morning church service, there was an extreme sport dirt bike race going on right next to the highway in front of our church building. As we led the Sunday school class outside to do a craft, a biker got hit by a car and was badly hurt. While the emergency vehicles came to assist, the other racers zoomed by as fast as ever. Why? Because they had a race to win…there was fame and money to be gained.
While I don’t like morning sickness, I love being pregnant and nursing. I would rather be tired with my arms full than rested with them empty. Are there hurts and pains that go with it? Of course. With most anything worth having or doing doesn’t come without a price. But the reward is so much more than worth it!
Can I be effective for the Lord if I am run down, nursing, and pregnant all the time? The wonderful thing is the Lord has called me to be a help meet for my wonderful husband. He has called me to be the mommy to 11, soon to be 12, precious children. And when I am just where He has called me, faithful through the hard times, resting in His abounding grace and strength, I am the most effective I can be for Him. He is ever faithful even when I am not; ever ready to forgive, and sooo good. I love the Lord with all my heart and want to be a faithful servant wherever He has us.
And, just for the record, I’m not always run down. I am so blessed with such loving joyful helpers and lots of energy. And I’m not pregnant all the time…only about 9 months of the year :)


  1. I just want you to know that I think you are a fantastic shining example to women everywhere. You do more in your day with your 11 kiddos and 1 on the way than I do at home with my 2 kids! I love reading about your family and the things you do together. You inspire me with new ways to connect with my kids and grow in our faith. You keep right on doing what your doing and pay no mind to the words of those with hate in their hearts!

  2. Beautiful post! I have really enjoyed reading your blog and marvelling at your family. The Lord does work in ways we don't always understand but we need to always praise Him.

    Keep up the good work doing God's work, being your husband's help mate, and a nurturing mom to your kids.


  3. Jaynee,
    I thank you for these words from your heart. I was only able to have 3 children before needing a hysterectomy at age 36. I surely would have loved many more children. I am so thankful for my 3 grown children who are all living for the Lord.
    Love in Him,
    Janice in New Hampshire

  4. Oh Jaynee,
    I have a difficult time trying not to jump through the screen to hug you!

    Knowing that all credit goes to the Lord for anything good he does in any of us, let me just say, your life, your testimony inspires me! I can't tell you how often I may get discouraged and then think, "If Jaynee can do it with 11, I can do it with 5--we serve the same Lord who will enable us! And you serve your family with such humility and grace. There is no way that ANYTHING else you could do, could speak the gospel more to a lost world, than LIVING it in your home. You are a woman, not a man, and you are being obedient to the calling the Lord has given you as a wife. No, it's not popular, and sometimes it can be scary, but, oh, is there anything more precious?

    Jaynee, I have a feeling that God's plans for you go much farther than Mexico. You are training an army, and mentoring to thousands of women, just by sharing some of your life.

    Thank you for being an example of a living sacrifice!

    Much love,

  5. Oh Jaynee, What a touchy subject. I will admit that I have wondered how your body holds up. I have had two children and my body shows the wear. I see other families on tv that have many children and wonder why but it seems that faith is something these families always share. I don't live my life to serve my husband like you do. But I love my husband and I seem to live my life to be a mother to my girls. I think when it comes down to it while we are different, we are similar too. We love our children, our husbands and our God. I think it is amazing that you are the mother to so many and you seem to enjoy each minute of it. I long for more children and pray that we are blessed with them, not 10 though!! But the thing that stands out in this post is that I too would rather have my arms full and be tired than rested and empty. For the past 4 years I have been pregnant or nursing and the feelings of both are overwhelming. I love that you love your family the way you do....in God's love, Melinda

  6. Jaynee: do you have an email address? I want to ask you a question, but not post it for everyone to see. Mine is slfunk3763@hotmail.com. If you would email me with Lockwood in the subject bar that would be great. Your post was beautiful.

  7. Very well said! You have encouraged me and reminded me of areas that I fall short - I,too, am a work in progress.

    Your family is beautiful and you are truly blessed. What a blessing you are to those around you!
    Thanks for sharing your heart and always being a light, even in the trials.

    loving Him,
    ps Cinnamon directed me, your way.

  8. Love those last few lines! Very well wrote! May God cntinue to bless you and yours every moment of everyday!
    God Bless!

  9. Jaynee, You are such an encouragement to me! I can only imagine the impact you are making for the kingdom of God!

    Much love to you!

  10. Mrs. Lockwood-

    Thank you for that wonderful post. It was very encouraging. My husband and I are also praying that the Lord will allow us to have a big family, and are trusting Him to plan it in His timing. I'm due in a few weeks with our fourth, and this pregnancy has been one of counting the cost and truly needing to rely on the Lord much more than the previous three. I want you to know that reading your blog has been a tremendous blessing and encouragement to me, especially this post. Our oldest daughter (5) loves to look at the photos of your precious children when I read your blog, and we pray for you all often.

    Amy in Minnesota

  11. Do not allow the evil one to steal your joy. Or use someone else to steal it. You know where true joy comes from. You are doing as you feel God is leading you. You have no one to answer to except God.
    Do not allow this person's words to shut down your blog. You witness to and are an encouragement to many. If you allow this person to shut this door, the evil one has won a victory. Just delete the comments and go on with the wonderful life God has given you.
    Please don't stop. You are an encouragement!

  12. THANK YOU! You are a blessing!

  13. Jaynee,
    We have 4 children, ages 13, 11, 3, and 8 months. The big gap in the middle was God's timing not ours because we did not want to wait that long. All my pregnancies have been miserable with difficult deliveries. I am a different woman pregnant. I wouldn't change a thing though. My husband and I are in our mid 40s and are in prayer about more children. I so appreciate your blog and it is a blessing to read about your family. You are doing exactly what God created you to do. I am praying for you.
    Jenny in Texas

  14. What a beautiful post from your heart. Although I am not planning on having a similar sized family, I enjoy reading about all of your little blessings and the ministry the Lord has called you to. I just finished a Titus 2 study called Feminine Appeal and you are a shining example of what the Lord has called us as wives and mothers to be. Thank you for sharing your love for the Lord and your family with the world.

  15. Your words are eloquent and so warmly spoken! Just as others choose to limit we can just as freely choose to accept these wonderful little ones. I know many woman with two children who also work full time jobs and they are just as tired as I am, if not more.

    I needed to read your words today! I am 30weeks pregnant with #8 and my back has been hurting so badly for a few days. In my pitty party I can very easily justify "being done" but the truth is "With most anything worth having or doing, doesn’t come without a price. But the reward is so much more than worth it!"

    Thank you for that reminder. I am blessed to have a back ache because it means that in a few short weeks I will get to hold another precious baby in my arms, Lord willing!!

    Have a blessed rest of the week!!

  16. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  17. To the Amanda who left a comment here~
    While I can't publish the comment you left, I would love to talk with you more, especially about why we believe that salvation comes through Jesus Christ alone.
    If you would like, you can email me. Our email address is on the bottom of the right side bar.

  18. Way to go Lockwood family. I deeply admire and appreciate you for the way you care for your family and the way you inspire others to just keep the faith. You are doing a great job with family and a beautiful work for Jesus. Your children will grow up remembering your love and nurturing for them, not how sick you may have felt. They will never forget your being there for them and the beautiful example you are setting for others. Your post was beautifully written. Jesus is giving you strength no matter how nauseous or tired you may feel right now. Keep looking up.
    Marie in NC

  19. Jaynee!

    You, Daniel and your children are such an amazing example of life in our culture of death! I look at my friends with many children with awe...they inspire me to be a better mother to my three (that we have so far).

    Before Mike and I came to understand that birth control was wrong, we contracepted...we now mourn those children we didn't have. We are praying for more now. And our marriage has been greatly blessed and enriched since we put our trust in Him and removed any barriers between us.

    This is an issue that is very close to my heart as I felt I was deceived by the evil one via popular culture, technological advances and the need for "quality time" for each child. Even my family thinks we're nuts to be open to life...but our fertility is a gift from God. I will never throw that gift back in His face because we're only "supposed" to have two children. If you ever want to discuss it via email, know that you'll get 100% support from me.

    Please keep the Philippines in your prayers as they are trying to introduce 2-child legislation.

    And, btw, I am one of those people who ecologically breastfeeds and still gets her fertility back by 8 weeks post-partum :o)

    Feel free to edit this post. I just want you to feel encouraged. I love that you have so many children and I can hardly wait to hear what you will name "Justin."

    In Christ,

  20. Amen! Amen! Amen! I only have six but have heard all the comments. I, too, just want to give you a big hug. Tell those "nay sayers" that as the children grow and become teens that your physical work load will get lighter, your children will be better trained for life, and your children will be your best friends for life!

    I was the oldest of four and my mother died when I was 17. My aunts told me later that they all thought my mother was too harsh on us - making us do so many "chores". Of course, we weren't happy with chores, but we knew we had to do them. When she died, we were able to keep house for my dad because she had taught us how to keep house - and she didn't know the Savior!

    God knows what he is doing. Thank you for sharing your struggle. God bless you today!

  21. Well I for one admire what you are able to do. I chose to stop having children after 3, and most days I am so tired I can' stand it. I am in awe at how selfless you are and how you have opened your heart to God and said "your will is my will" and allowed him to work his ways and bless ou with such a wonderful family. I don't think you are abusing your body and missing out on serving him at all. I think its quite the opposite. You serve him by following his word of "Go forth and multiple" and by teaching your children to be faithful serveants of the Lord. Koodos to you. Don't let anyone ever tell you other wise. You are a wonderful Christian, and a wonderful Mother.

  22. What a wonderful post. IF more people kept their eyes on God instead of judging eachother this world would be a much peaceful place. We have experienced sad comments from others because we have adopted disabled children. Comments like "Why don't you give back the disabled ones since you are able to have your own if you are patient enough." Each and everyone of God's children are a blessing and as we told the social workers, we would take whatever God brought to our home. The most upsetting part of adoption for us was the forms the social workers gave us to fill out on what we wanted~ race/gender/age/special gifts. We refused to fill them out! I would not trade our blessings for anything. Yes, my days are often hard but I feel so blessed. THank you for sharing your story about standing in faith.

  23. God bless you for being obedient to His word and calling! Being a mommy is God's highest calling, why wouldn't we want it over and over again?! With each child, God just gives more blessings and love.

  24. Dear Jaynee

    Thank you so much for this amazing encouragement. We have six blessings and are praying that the Lord will choose to bless us again. We used to use hormonal bc between our first four...we were in control or so we thought. Between 3 and 4 we were nursing and using the minipill(oh how I regret that)anyway I was going to college taking four classes, nursing a busy one year old and started having heart palpitations...went to the doctor and found out we were 21 weeks pregnant. There is a five year span here that the Lord opened our eyes and he has given us such a peace about leaving this area in his hands. When "we were in control" there was no peace. Thank you for your encouragement and for sending your schedule. It has helped me so much. Have a blessed day!

    In Christ,

  25. I want to tell you how much your post meant to me. I am a happy Mother but very tired Mother to five. I know that sounds so silly but it is true. We are having discipline problems with #4 who is turning 4 in a few days. And we are getting through some attitude problems with #1 girl almost 13. I encourage her and 10 year od daughter to read great blogs like yours, it is good for them to see that there are other large families out there (even larger than ours) and to see how happy and content they are. We are at a point in our life that our 5th daughter is 4 months old and my cycles have already returned. This usually does not happen till about 10 months after birth so we are about to face something we have never done before after having a baby. No birth control. It is a scary place I am at. We so strongly feel that the Lord wants us to not limit our size but I worry about so many c sections. Sarah was my third and I also must say VERY BEST c-section. It was so encouraging to hear words in your post that build us up in our beliefs instead of tear down that we normally hear. We love reading your blog. My girls get up every day and look forward to a new post or go over old ones. I do have a few questions if you ever have time to post about them. Discipline and I know most people think they will grow out of it. But we expect first time obedience and that is really hard for some of our kids. The other one would be kindness to others. I hate to hear my children speak to each other sometimes like the world does- harsh and mean spirited. I love all of your advice. It is so helpful. Also I know Mexico is a huge country but we have missionary groups go out from our area to the Whichou Indian groups. I am sure I spelled that wrong but I was just wondering if that was near you. I'll get a better location and let you know. Praying for your family, Missy in TN

  26. Dear Jaynee,
    What a beautiful heart you have. The Lord has done a great work in you. I was blessed by your post today. You may be interested to read a similar post on my blog from a short time ago. (http://dailypleasures.blogspot.com/2008/08/musings-on-motherhood-my-journey_27.html)
    After our seventh baby was born and I had postpartum hemorrhage for the third time, my doctor told me with tears that if I were to conceive again, she would not deliver since she considered it would be life-threatening for me. After much prayer, we trusted in the Lord (and found a new OB) and He has given us four more children with no complications since that time. What would I do without my Sarah Grace (her name was a testimony to God's grace), my Matthew, my Beka-boo, or my sweet Caleb? I am so thankful that we trusted in Him. He is faithful!

  27. God has given you such a sweet spirit, Jaynee.

    Thanks for the encouraging post.

    We, too, have left having children in God's hands, and only have had 4 (soon to be 5) children in nearly 15 years. God uses each of us differently and knows what each of us can handle. I cannot imagine the day-to-day life you live, but I LOVE reading about it and praying for your family. Your posts bring me joy and your children SHINE the Love of Christ. Keep up the great work you are doing for Him.

    In His grip,
    Leah in Alaska

  28. What a beautiful post.

    I admire you for your faithfulness to the Lord's calling..no matter how many children he chooses to bless you with. I pray that others who read your blog will see your shining, faithful example.

    By the way..I love that every time you share a new picture of one (or more) of your children, they are always happy and smiling. :D

  29. Thank you for this post. We have eight kids. Seven by birth and one by adoption. I have also had four miscarriages. People do tend to be rude whent they find out I'm pregnant again and confused as to why I would want to have so many children. I do love being home with them and home schooling has worked wonderfully for our family. We are not perfect but I do believe we are doing what God has asked us to do.


  30. Amen and amen and amen and amen!

  31. I have 4 children. 1 of which is a reversal. My husband I went through a period of "chasing the wind." Always looking for more and better. After our 3rd child we decided to have a vasectomy to stop God's blessings. We didn't know. It wasn't till 1 year later that we were convicted. We couldn't have our reversal appointment fast enough in our eyes, but God was faithful. We were able get our appointment 6 weeks early! Praise the Lord we were pregnant 3 months later with our precious #4. We are praying that the flood gates would open, but she is now 14months old and we are still waiting. The idea of never having another little one in my arms breaks my heart. Though I am thankful for the blessings He has so graciously given, it is hard to imagine my life with so few, when He has worked in my heart and changed our hearts to accept as many as He would have for us. It is a much longer story, but I am so encouraged by your family and all the love of the Lord that you have. I can't wait for more and unless God takes you there, you can't understand. Thanks so much for sharing.

  32. You know when I read your orginal post I thought "that is how I feel too" and I only have 3 children. It doesn't matter how many children you have, at the end of the day we all have those feelings. If the person who made such rude comments doesn't feel that way at the end of her day then she is lying. The calling of training our children in righteousness is huge task and often takes everything we have.

    You and your husband are doing what the Lord has called your family to do. This is part of your ministry. Many people abuse their body by not taking care of it, child birth is never abuse of the body.

    Press on. Be faithful to calling in which you have been called.

    My best,
    Beth Johnson
    Montgomery, Al

  33. Jaynee,
    Thank you for your post. I just wanted to let you know how encouraging all of your posts are to me. I appreciate how much you have opened up your life and work. I pray that God will continue to richly bless you and your entire family.
    Que Dios les bendiga mucho

  34. Thank you for your post! I think more people need to hear that children are a blessing, and not a curse. I also appreciate your openness into the fact that there are difficult times, but that it is not your own strength, but the Lord's that sees you/us through.

    On some level, all moms can relate.

    We only have 4 children on earth, and more awaiting us in heaven. Each one is a special blessing from the Lord.

    Thank you for your testimony!


  35. You sound so happy in your post. Your children are beautiful and they are blessed to have a mother who loves them so much.


  36. Jaynee,
    Thank you for your post. As always you are so encouraging and loving. It always makes me happy to read your posts.


  37. Well said!!
    My husband and I are missionaries in Canada. We have 8 children, and my dh runs a Bible camp. When the children were all small, I did almost nothing with the camp. I felt that I wanted to help out with the ministry, but I couldn't. There was the struggle that you mentioned in my heart.
    My oldest is now 17, and taking university courses over the internet. Our children are our arrows! Because they have had a stable, happy upbringing, they are now workers in God's mission field as well. The four oldest ones all worked full time at the camp this summer. The did very well at being competent, obedient, spiritual helpers. Now that my youngest is 2 and my older children can watch her sometimes, or I can take her with me, I do a little more for the camp, so while I am still a full time mom, I can be of service to the Lord in another area too. There will always be coworkers and others who think that we are doing things wrong - no matter what we do. We need to do the thing that the Lord is calling us to do - as you are! And soon your arrows will be ready to be used of the Master outside of their own home too. :)

  38. Good job Jaynee!!! As you know from our testimony after our 13th we are praying for another, but my time is running out...that time will come. For our family our whole daily life is so much easier as we work together and the mommy is not singlehandedly doing all the work, its an incredible blessing!! You just rest your heart and know your following the scripture,you will be the one that is going to be blessed. As the word says if ye do it to the least of these, you do it unto the Lord. You are giving and serving in your own home. May the joy of the Lord be your strength and may he bring truth to those hearts that resist God's word, they are the ones missing out on blessings.

  39. God bless you, Jaynee, and your family! Such joy spills over from not just this post.
    Someone mentioned children being arrows - and how true. (Jesus had 12 disciples with whom He most intimately ministered) :). Be encouraged, knowing how many people truly support your family.
    I, like many, have never conceived while nursing, and my five children are 21 to 31 months apart. At 37, we lost two babies this year to miscarriage. I pray for more, but most of all desire God's will.

  40. Jaynee, we too get this comment/question so very much. We have the "abuse your body" comments by some "concerned" family members while others are always saying one needs time for themselves to function. I honestly know and feel your joy with which you write. I too am exhausted on some days but it is a tired that is more fulfilling than anyone can ever imagine until they have been in these shoes. I have just found over the last few years that people cannot fathom it until they have experienced this place in life. There truly is no greater joy. I love how much more fulfilled I become every year as we seek the Lord and follow Him in every area....including welcoming in our many closely spaced children along with many others areas such as finances that He has used to really convict us about and call our lives into order. With some of my pregnancies I have had some trepidation as those 2 little lines showed up, knowing what others would think once the news was out, but the more we have the more exciting it gets and the more excited we get. The joy that comes is incomprehensible.

    We are here in not so far away west TX walking this road of many...though not quite so many as y'all just yet....children with you. As we homeschool and study our way through geography y'all have become our "contact" family to lift up in prayer as we pray for the country of Mexico and all of its inhabitants.

    I thought your entry was entirely well written and speaks the heart of the joy of raising so very many.

  41. Wow :) At first, when I started reading your blog entries for the 1st time, I was so in shock that you had 11 children...I was thinking "how in the world?" and "I could never do that" but, after continually reading, I realized that God has called you to be an incredible mother to 11, soon 12, children :) I wondered how anyone could handle 11 children, but you have shown that all it really takes is serving the Lord, and loving all those little ones :)

    Thank you for being such an encouragement! It's so awesome that you not only are living in a 3rd world country, but also that you are following God's will for your life, and even though you've had fears about raising your children in Mexico, God has provided completely! :) Sooo awesome!!!!

    Seriously, thank you for helping me to realize that as long as we are serving God and doing His will, that even when we think we can't handle it, that really, we can't :) But that God can!!! :) :) :)

  42. wonderful post!!! I look at your blog often and admire you for your faithfulness to God!!

  43. I love this post and the one it is referring to. I love the previous post because it made you seem real. You have always seemed to have it together...I admire you and what you do. The posts encouraged me. I love te story about how the town came about. Amazing!! Also it makes me unhappy that you would have comments such as that one, but we know where this comes from. You are doing an awesome job and keep up the amazing work.

  44. Blessings of a Child
    "Here is a little mouth to kiss; here are two more feet to make music with their pattering about my nursery. Here is a soul to train for God, and the body in which it dwells is worth all it will cost, since it is abode of a kingly tenant.
    Yes, my precious baby, you are welcome to your mother’s heart, welcome to her time, her strength, her health, to her most tender cares, to her life~long prayers! Oh how rich I am, how truly, how marvelously blest!"

    "Stepping Heavenward"
    by Elizabeth Prentiss

  45. I loved this post. :) I am pregnant now for the sixth time in six years and I have experienced the same struggles and doubts regarding whether or not we are doing the right thing regarding letting the Lord control my womb. I have also found the same joy and peace you describe as I have learned to see my children not as a burden but as a ministry...future servants of the living God! Thank you.

  46. You are a sweetie. I am not a Christian and I would not choose to have such a large family (though that's partly because one of my children has special needs and requires a LOT of time and energy). So, you and I are different. BUT, you have made the decisions that are right for YOU and YOUR FAMILY and YOUR GOD . . . more power to you! I have a great deal of respect for you and your decisions and your parenting. You go girl!

  47. Praise God for your family! First off, I was put on the dreaded BC pill about a 1 1/2 after having our second child due to extremely irregular cycles and several near DNC's. I then developed high blood pressure and went off of the pill after 5 months on and my blood pressure returned to normal. Immediately my husband and I decided to try for #3 and let go and let God. It's been a year now and probably 100s of dollars worth of pregnancy tests and no double lines yet. I struggle to want a baby so bad and yet it's not been in God's will. I will never again use the pill. Our bodies are a temple for God and every child is a creation of God's, therefore every pregnancy is from God. Soem may say, well what about rape victims or underage girls, well God can choose good in times of evil. I do not believe in abortion what so ever and "the pill" many times causes it without the woman ever knowing. When we say "my body", "my time", "my energy", etc. we are just being selfish. Especially when our days are riddled with it. I am so encouraged by your family and how you and your husband have let go and let God. We as believers will face much persecution and the Lord will equip us to deal with it and hopefully use us to change hearts. Keep giving yourselves to the Lord. Blessings Megan!

  48. You have an amazing family--I admire you and your husband so much!

    Thank you for sharing your life and ministry on-line.

    You have such a wonderful, kind heart it comes through with all of your kind words. Again thank you.

  49. I agree so very much with what you say. My babies haven't been quite as close together, but when my 9th was born (May21) my oldest was still 9. God tells us in the Bible that children are a blessing. He does not say that only the first 2, or 4 or 10 are blessings, and that after having that many children, any more is a curse. Some people find it hard to believe that I am always happy to be pregnant again, but it really is true. My baby is 4-1/2 months now, and I would love to be pregnant again. Except for my 2 miscarriages, my pregnancies have been very easy though, so that makes life a lot easier.
    Best wishes for this pregnancy, and I love your blog. Geraldine

  50. I am in tears... We have 5 that are 6yrs and under. Although they have all been two years apart (the first were twins) I have had to have C-sections. Trust me, we have fought it every way possible from the beginning but even according to two "homebirth" midwives my hips are to small. I hear it constantly that I am killing myself by continuing. I LOVE being pregnant and nursing! I have had all healthy pregnancies and we really want to have more. Sometimes it feels like trusting God is not the hard part... the hard part is dealing with those in your life who do not trust Him.
    Thank you so much for your words of wisdom and the example you have been to so many! You are a blessing! Keep trusting and loving Him.

  51. Giving birth to 13 children and seeking to nurture and admonish them in the Lord I think I can encourage you mommys that are in the middle of it all and share an illustration to those that do not see the blessing of children. Jaynee right now you are in the labor/sowing stage, I myself am in the reaping/resting stage. Bearing children and nuturing them is as a garden, you till, you plant, you water, you pick weeds out, you hoe around the plants, you water again and again, you prune, you tenderly care for them but it is laborious, toilsome, you get sweat on you brow, you back hurts from bending over and so on....then comes the reaping, the bounty, the fruit, the rewards from the extremely hard work!! It is very hard work to raise a family, to care for them, to train and discipline, to teach, to take care of all the daily chores!! Just as one will literally get tired out in the garden, my husband does, we will become weary in child training, but the reaping does come! I have more strength and feel better than I have ever felt, I am reaping, but there was a time that I was weary, worn, and tired...do not grow weary Jaynee and you other young mommys, your reaping will come!!!
    Cindy (mommy of 13)

  52. I absolutely agree with what you said about people who put their lives on the line for the good of others. We call them heroes! Jesus is very clear when He says, "For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake and for the gospel will save it." Those of us who offer ourselves to God to receive the children He sends are simply desiring to live out that principle in the way He has led us. It shouldn't surprise us that if we are living in antithesis to the gods of our age, that we will be criticized!

    Btw, I especially enjoyed seeing the pictures of your little blonde Susannah! They reminded me so much of myself at that age, with all the siblings gathered around the table with her! I was #4 of 9 children. :-) (And was named for Susanna Wesley, mother of 19...)

  53. Thank you so much for your encouraging posts! May God continue to give you strength as you do His will!

  54. Thank you for posting this! It is encouraging to read how you have found your place and peace in doing what God has called you to do! More power to you! As a child from a family of 8, I am so greatful for my parents willingness to trust God in this area. I love my family and am so blessed by each one of my siblings. Children are indeed a blessing and such a generous gift from God. To know that he puts a little piece of himself in each of us, how can we not want to see more of God?? Me and my husband have been married a year and half and already have our first little one. I know God knows best. God bless you!!!

  55. Its been interesting reading what all you ladies have to say. My wife said within one week of our first son Peter's homebirth that she couldn't wait to do it again. My parents cut off children. My wife's parents did. My parents whole generation neglected the blessing of God and only the wise are regretful. My own father wept and asked my forgiveness for the siblings they stole from me. Children are an inheritance from God and are our ammunition(arrows). I for one hope that I am blessed with more than one arrow. I never question that God will supply our needs as we trust him in the area of family size. It believe it takes the faith of a Christian to have peace. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your paths. Prov.3:6. The Lockwoods have acknowledged him in their ways and what we see in their lives is God's direction. I hope we can come see you sometime. God bless you. Eric from Wyoming

  56. Wonderful post, Jaynee. You and your family are such an inspiration to me....but I have to remind myself that your faithful quiet hour with the Lord *is* the strength of your days. What you do is simply *not* natural - it's SUPER-natural; I truly believe that, and God has seen fit to entrust you with many blessings!!
    ~Christal from Canada

  57. Jaynee,
    What a wonderful post you wrote with such grace and kindness. You are doing a fantastic job rearing up your children, honoring and serving your husband, reaching out to the people of Mexico. I know the Lord must be so proud of you!!! You are truly honoring HIM and you are such an amazing example of a giving, loving mother and wife. You are an inspiration! I had 3 kids in 2 years and they are now 4, 3, and 2. They are such a blessing! I hope we can adopt in the future!! God bless you and your beautiful family.
    Love, Rachel

  58. Jaynee,

    I liked your blog today. I'm happy to have so many nephews and nieces even if one sister gives me the majority of them. My friend Sarah and I are tied with number of nephews and nieces and she comes from a family of 11. I only come from our family of 5. I'm surprised you don't have any twins, but who know maybe you will one day. Take care and have a wonderful day.

    Julee (I have no idea how to not send comments anonymously, so I have to do it that way.)

  59. I loved reading this- esp. the part where you said "But I know God made me just how I am and why should the clay say to the Potter why have you made me this way?"

    That statement is so true- I need to remember that!

    You are such an inspiration to me!!
    Thank you for sharing and allowing God to use you and your family for His Glory!

    God Bless!!
    ~Samantha in Nor Cal.

  60. I'm a newlywed, and I grew up in a family of eight. Many of my friends (who came from large families themselves) and I often discuss having large families of our own. Some of them are even now reluctant to make the same sacrifices our parents did, which is very sad.

    Thank you, though, for sharing your thoughts with us. I was greatly encouraged.

    You have such a and sweet spirit, and a lovely family! May the joy of our Lord continue to be your strength...

  61. My grandmother, God Bless her, had 12 children. She was patient and wonderful and the most Christian woman I have ever known. I have repeatedly said that if she couldn't make to heaven, than none of us have a chance. She never 'preached' her religion, she lived...as a beautiful person. And when asked in her later years what she'd really like...it was to have all her children small again, and back home with her. I think that is saying a lot about the how wonderful motherhood is, and what a blessing it is to experience it.

  62. I am a new reader to your blog. That was a beautiful post and such encouragement for moms. The love you have for your children, husband and most of all God is pouring out of every word you type. Thank you.

  63. I forgot something that I wanted to ask you. I homeschool also and during this year I am teaching about Cultures and Countries to my 7 year old son. Our curriculum suggested trying to find a missionary child to be pen pals with and I wondered if that was possible for my son to write to one of your children who was the same age. My e-mail is kuykfamily@yahoo.com.

  64. I get this all the time and I only have 6 kids. I have 4 under the age of 3 and at times when I start to think that it is to much to handle I login on and read your blogs. It helps me so much. You are an amazing mom. You have came to my church a few times and I'm always amazed at your family. Keep on Keeping

  65. WOW. As someone who has no intention of ever being pregnant, I must admit I am amazed and in awe of you and your family. What an incredible job you are doing!
    Although I always wanted lots of children, I only ever intended to adopt. I figure that each one coming out of me is one less coming out of Foster Care. While we only have 2 adopted children, I am exhausted and tired and cranky on a daily basis and cannot imagine how much stronger than I you must be. Kudos to you for living what you believe, regardless of what others may say.

  66. Thank you for your words,thoughts, and sincere devotion to our Lord. You and your family are nothing short of an inspiration to all! We love you!! You are a breath of fresh air, and help to keep others motivated and focus on what is really important!!

  67. May the Lord bless you and keep you. Thank you for sharing from your heart, you certainly encouraged mine.

    Amy from Georgia

  68. jaynee thanks so much for sharing from the heart! you are such a blessing...I always love to hear how God has spoken to couples in this area...as you know we have 5 ages 7 and under (2 adopted) and people are astonished whenever we say we can't wait to have another baby! We are constantly being almost "reprimanded" for thinking of it! But inside our hearts there is only joy and peace...and it's true...I can't wait to be pregnant again!

  69. You know, I am in complete agreement with you from a "head knowledge" stand point. Because whether you are on the pill or just trying to "time" things to not get pregnant, really what you are doing is taking control into your hands and trying to take it out of God's.

    And I really believe this culture we are in has conditioned us as women to think we deserve certain things, such as "me time" and lunch with friends and shopping trips once the kids are all in school. But no where in the Bible are things like that mentioned!

    All that said, my husband and I have never intentionally tried to get pregnant. And yet we still have three kids four and under!! So God is still on the throne. And He is still in control, despite our feeble attempts to change that fact!

    Keep the faith!


  70. Jaynee....you are a wonderful example of a godly wife and mother. The world needs more like you. Your sweet heart for Christ shows in all you do. What grace!Thank you for standing firm in your calling to be a helpmate to your husband and mother of all the children the Lord choose to bless you with. There will always be nay sayers in this world not matter what we do...just follow the Lord and your husband and blessing will flow. Christ is our Master not the world. We love you very much!!!!

  71. Loved your post - and seeing your beautiful family. God has only blessed us with 3, but I have 5 more in heaven. I had always planned on having a very big family. My next sister down has 11 + 1 more in heaven. Altogether, my parents have over 21 grandchildren and 1 on the way. This Thanksgiving will be the first time in 7 years that we will have them all together - and my parents can't wait! Children are such a blessing - it is a rare moment indeed (usually after several sleepless night) that I feel otherwise. Thanks for such a wonderful post.

  72. I finally got around to reading this post Jaynee. Jacquee, then Amber from church, then Cassie...I realized I needed to catch up. Your answer was awesome and from the heart. You're way nicer than me.

    Your favorite sister,


  73. I so enjoy reading your entries! You lift up the Lord Jesus Christ and I know He blesses you for it! Keep doing that!
    How I wish I was more mature spiritually way back when my husband and I made the decision to limit the number of kids we had. Had I been, we might very well have several more "bundles of joy" in our home. I do have regrets about my lack of faith in this area and not allowing God to have His perfect will for us in our family! He is still marvelous and we have 3 fabulous children here and 1 in heaven!

  74. Dear Jaynee,

    I just now read this post. I don't even remember why I was checking the Oct. archives today... but at any rate, I found this post and read it through. I just wanted to say thank you for writing it. It answered a few questions I'd had regarding your current situation, etc. It was a blessing.

    Thank you for knowing what you believe. That's fast becoming a rare quality. I'm praying for you, and if God sends a little #13 along.... wouldn't that be a good time to get the guest house built???! (=

    Love and miss you,

  75. Could be the most influential paper I have read in my life?!


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